I'm just so fed up today. Fed up of life.
This blog has nothing to do with people or insecurities. It's just about the monotony of day to day life. My life, more than most is a little empty however from what I observe, there aren't many people who live exciting and interesting lives. I think my feelings were reignited by iianardo's latest video. He just talks about routine and waiting for something interesting to happen. I know that feeling so so well!
The difference between us (apart from the obvious) is that Ian goes and looks for the interesting event. I let life's worries hold me back from ever exploring. Fear has held me back my whole life and how do you ever shake it off? The common advise is usually "You've just got to go and do it"! But how? How do you just stop being a certain way and ignore all doubts and worries? I really don't know that it's possible.
Ian to me, leads a pretty exciting life in comparison to me, he drives all over visiting people, he plays in a band, he seems to enjoy himself, and yet he is totally bored and looking for more. So where does that leave me? If I were to shake off some fears and start living, how long would it be before the new routine bores me? So do you continue to always pursue new things until it kills you? I read a lot of blogs by people taking exams and fretting about what lies on the horizon. I wish I could reassure them, however at twenty-five, I have no idea what life is all about and how to make the most of it. I don't know if anyone is truly satisfied with their lives.
Again, I use Alex Day as an example of somebody who seems to be really making life exciting for himself. To some extent, he has been extremely lucky achieving "fame" on youtube, which seems to allow him financially to survive without a job and allowing him to travel all over the world. I wonder how many people with £800 in the bank, would throw it away for three days in Australia? But that experience of flying to a foreign country, partying with unfamiliar people and tasting a new culture for just a little bit is surely more rewarding than buying a big plasma tv or some material goods. In years to come, those experiences will really matter.
So why do people live day to day without making anything happen for themselves, why do we accept the day to day routine we become tangled up in? Is it a fear of death? Are we to afraid to end it and get out? I think it is. I think we are too afraid of life and of death which seems to lead to a vicious circle of averageness.
Well, I hope that's cheered you all up. Let me know what you think, am I right? If not, what do you think?
2 comments:
I've been where you seem to be at Dom, and the reality is that you need to either hunt for something or let the slower option happen and 'it' to come to you.
I went for the fast option and didn't manage to find anything to excite me and let the slower option take over me, and eventually after a lot longer than I hoped it happened, I found a new side of me that was just waiting to be developed.
I guess a day to day routine can lead you down totally different paths.
Just keep smiling Dom <3
your comments remind me of this song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yt-IBJpEMzA&feature=channel_page
you're right, no one is truly satisfied with their lives, not all the time anyways. what helps me is that i try to challenge myself to be better at whatever i am doing. for instance work: i don't by any means have my dream job, but i still challenge myself to be better at whatever task i am doing and this makes everyday a little bit more exciting.
i have also found that setting goals or hopes ahead of me helps. for instance, looking forward to a holiday a few months out gets me through the monotony of everyday. And, when i go on holiday or do any other recreational activity, i make sure i do what I will enjoy, not what other people tell me i should do so that i get the most satisfaction out of it. by looking forward to traveling, my job just becomes a means to an end and so i don't mind it not being exciting.
really, we just have to pick how we want to get satisfaction out of life. we can't get it in every way. it's a give and take. For instance, some people chose be satified by their career, but they sacrifice holidays/traveling, and family time to acheive this. Others choose to get satisfaction by traveling or singing, and are willing to sacrifice having to career of their dreams to take any job that will allow them to travel or sing.
so i guess what i am trying to say is that you have to pick what is most important to you in life and pursue that, and allow the rest of your life be monotonous, boring, unexciting for the acheivement of that one thing you value most.
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