Blog

I don't know what to write about, the purpose of this is merely to help relieve boredom and use up twenty minutes before Ugly Betty finishes and I can watch it on the PVR.

I just talked to Tom briefly in Stickam, it were just me and him for a bit which was nice because I've felt more distant from him recently. I like Tom, he is a nice young man, most of the time. As for my relationships with other people at the moment, as ever, it's up and down. I feel let down by certain people, some more than others and rarely they want to make an effort to put it right, even though they know something must be wrong. Certain people don't talk to you for days and weeks and I guess I'm supposed to be fine with that. I can't always be the one making the effort. I guess it's more a matter of me needing their friendship but them certainly not needing mine. But complicated though I may be, I feel justified in feeling pissed off when I'm ignored.

Got the Kings of Leon album the other day, haven't listened to it much but I will and I'm sure it'll be as fantastic as the last three. One album I have been playing rather a lot is the Spice Girls greatest hits CD and the first ten tracks are amazing, they remind me of being young. Being taken back to my youth is a great feeling until you realise you can never get it back. I wish I could look forward and be excited by times ahead but I love nostalgia, I am a pessimist and I yearn to be young and carefree. Being an adult is far too complicated and I've been far too confused and unhappy for too long for adulthood to be even the slightest bit appealing. I was reading Mr Day's blog earlier and I wish I could adopt his philosophy on life, I admire the way he lives his life but I also know I could never live that way as much as I would like to.

Some people do want to talk to me and some people do confide in me, those people don't know it, but it means a lot to me. It's all very well to have hundreds of friends, they just become numbers. Inevitably, you can't please that many people, so friendships will weaken and you'll end up with a hell of a lot of acquaintances but nobody to really talk to. That's not for me.

Righto, It's pretty much time for Ugly Betty to finish, so I shall wrap this blog up here and say goodbye.